J.R. REVIEWS JAY Z

The latest release from The Greatest Rapper of All Time (in my opinion). I’m going to go track by track, to give my impressions (plus, it give me another excuse to listen to it all the way through again ^_^).

1/ WHAT WE TALKIN’ ABOUT (featuring Luke Steele). 4:04

“I don’t run rap no more, I run the map.”

A nice way to open the album. A good mid-tempo track, with Jay Z talking about himself, as well as the state of the rap game in general. Austrialian singer Luke Steele does a decent job on the chorus.

2/ THANK YOU 4:09

“Please don’t bow in my presence, how am I a Legend? I just got 10 #1 albums, Maybe now 11.”

Another decent mid-tempo track.

3/ D.O.A. (DEATH OF AUTO-TUNE) 4:15

Only rapper to rewrite history without a pen, No I.D. on the track let the story begin…

For some reason, this song had to grow on me. When I first heard it, it didn’t really grab me. But the more I listened to it, the better it got to me. This is almost a rock song, with a thumbing beat that Jay flow effortlessly over.

4/ RUN THIS TOWN (featuring Rhianna & Kanye West) 4:17

Life’s a game but it’s not fair, I break the rules so I don’t care.

Here’s where the album really picks up. Great beat. Jay’s @ his best, Rhianna’s vocals are superb, and Kanye West almost upstages Jay with his verse near the end.

5/ EMPIRE STATE OF MIND (featuring Alicia Keyes) 4:37

I’m the new Sinatra, and since I made it here, I can make it anywhere, yeah they love me everywhere.

Slowing down a little bit again, with a track that has Jay revealing his love for his home state, backed by a killer chorus by the Amazing Alicia Keyes.

6/ REAL AS IT GETS (featuring Young Jeezy) 4:13

Follow in my footprints you can’t fail, set sail, I used to duck shots but now I eat quail.

PASS. The first weak link of the set. I’ve never like Young Jeezy, and I don’t feel he adds anything to this track. I suppose this helps Jay keep his “street cred” with the kids, but it does nothing for me.

7/ ON TO THE NEXT ONE (featuring Swizz Beats) 4:13

Hov on that new shit, niggas like how come? Niggas want my old shit, buy my old album.

Good lyrics, but the beat takes some getting used to. Producer Swizz Beats doesn’t really ad much to it. It’s a decent track overall, but not one of my favorites.

8/ OFF THAT (featuring Drake) 4:16

This ain’t Black versus White, my nigga we off that, please tell Bill O Reilly to fall back. Tell Rush Limbaugh to get off my balls, its 2010 not 1864.

A dope beat by Timbaland, not the type of beat you’re used to hearing Jay on, which shows his willingness to experiment. This is the perfect song for dancefloors in clubs. However, like Swizz Beats in the previous track, Drake on the chorus doesn’t add much to the song, it could have been done by anyone. Also, all of the talk about moving towards “the future” might have had more impact if Jay didn’t insist on sticking with using the “N-word.”

9/ A STAR IS BORN (featuring J. Cole) 3:47

[Lil’} Wayne scorching, I’ll applaud him, if he keep going, pass the torch to him,

Things really pick up again with this track. Jay gives a history lesson on rap, showing respect to his peers, as well as encouragment to some of the newer guys, with brilliant lyrics. Newcomer J. Cole’s verse @ the end also shows promise.

10/ VENUS VS. MARS 3:11

“I thought shorty liked Mike, found out she likes Prince. Thought she was Adrian, it’s been rocky ever since.”

A very clever track, with Jay rapping about the beginning and end of a relationship with a woman who was his complete opposite. There’s an uncredited woman’s voice on the chorus, that sounds like the woman in LL Cool J’s hit single “Doin’ It.” Don’t know if it’s the same, but this is one track that probably could’ve benefited from a full co-feature by some female rapper, to tell her side of the story. Nevertheless, this is a good song.

11/ ALREADY HOME (featuring Kid Cudi) 4:30

“And as for the critics, tell me I don’t get it. Everybody can tell you how to do it, but they never did it.”

A nice, mellow, catchy, song, with a flowing melody, as Jay raps about his critics, both in the rap game & out of it (even addressing the “camel-face” insults. Kid Cudi does a good job singing the chorus.

12/ HATE (featuring Kayne West) 2:31

“Name one thing that i aint done, it hurts when you say that i aint one,”

A short and rather uninteresting track, with Jay & Kanye rapping in some goofy accent about all of their “haters”. PASS.

13/ REMINDER 4:18

“10 number 1 albums in a row, who better than me? Only the Beatles, nobody ahead of me. I crush Elvis in his blue suede shoes, made The Rolling Stones seem sweet as Koolaid too.”

A mid-tempo track that’s essentially Jay bragging about how successful he is. Decent, but nothing special.

14/ SO AMBITIOUS (featuring Pharrell) 4:12

“Motivation to me, is them telling me what I could not be”

Slow track, with a nice message about what it takes to succeed, but overall rather uninspiring. Pharrell does his usual job on the chorus, but this isn’t one of their best collaborations.

15/ YOUNG FOREVER (featuring Mr. Hudson) 4:14

“So we live a life like a video, when the sun is always out and you never get old.
And the champagne’s always cold, and the music’s always good. And the pretty girls just happen to stop by in the hood.”

Jay samples a classic 80’s hit (Alphaville’s “Forever Young”) in this song, to brilliant effect. His lyrics are about feeling nostalgic for the past, enjoying the present, and preparing for the future. A great song to close out this album.

*****

So, to wrap it all up, I’ll say that this album’s biggest weak spots come from a few of the guest-artists, who’s additions seem unnecessary, and only designed to help Jay stay in touch with the younger kids. Instead of guys like Young Jeezy and Drake, he should have been getting Nas (who was reported to be on an early track), Eminem, and artists of that caliber.

I’ll also say that it’s a tad shorter than I’d expect these days. Another two or three songs (such as the previously released “Jockin’ Jay Z”) would have helped round it out more. But, overall, this album proves why Jay Z is, @ almost 40 years old, still @ the top of his game.

FINAL SCORE: 8 out of 10.

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TWITTER ME SOFTLY

It’s interesting how quickly technology changes today.
I’ve talked about how it’s odd to think that there are
teenagers today who’ve never bought an actual music
CD, all of their music as been downloaded (legally or
otherwise) from online. There are kids today who’ve
never experienced dial-up, they’ve always had DSL or
broadband.

The internet isn’t even that old, as far as being used
worldwide, yet last year when my modem broke for a
couple of days, I was lost without it.

I’m still behind, tech-wise, in some ways. I’ve missed the
texting craze. My cell-phone (only the 2nd one I’ve ever
owned), which I’ve had for maybe 5 years, is rather
old-fashioned. I remember when I bought it I was impressed
with how much smaller it was than my first one. I can fold it
& stick it in my back pocket. But it doesn’t take pictures, or
record videos, or have internet access like so many others
do these days. I’ve never felt the need for it, since I only
have the phone for emergencies. In case my car breaks
down, and I need to call Triple A, or something like that.
So I hardly ever even have it turned on.

Last Jan. an online friend wrote in one of my blogs that
she’d sent me a text message for New Years, which was
a few days earlier, so I turned on my phone & saw it,
& it turned out that there was another text message
from a real-life friend. I had no idea that I could even
receive texts on my phone, nor do I know how to reply
to them. And it’s probably because of this lack of
text-access that I’ve missed the lastest Next Big Thing
of the moment: TWITTER.

In the past couple of weeks I seem to be reading an awful
lot about it on various websites, and I was just listening
to a podcast a few days ago where they were talking about
it. I’ve also gotten a couple of requests recently, from
friends who are on it.

I don’t get it. @ all. I can’t see the point. Now, I am not
going to trash it, or say it’s some big waste of time, or
anything like that. Simply because that’s what I used to
say about Myspace years ago. I thought it was stupid,
and mocked those who were on it, especially those with
huge numbers of “friends.” And then I finally signed up
and quickly became addicted to it. Then a year or so ago
I signed up to Facebook and that became my new addiction.
And I’ve occasionally argued with “civilians” who like to claim
that Myspace & Facebook are a waste of time. So I could
be wrong about this, too.

But, really, what’s the point of Twitter? Let’s say I have
a Blackberry or iPhone. I’m supposed to be signed in to Twitter
constantly so I can read a bunch of “status updates” all day
long? On the podcast they were talking about how it’s great
because you can see people’s thoughts “in real time.”

Yeah, and?

Why do I need to know what you are doing, or what’s on
your mind, RIGHT NOW? Nor does anybody need to know
what I’m doing, or what’s on my mind, RIGHT NOW. My life
is not that interesting. My random thoughts are not that
interesting. And, I’m willing to bet, neither are any of yours.

I mean, Mon-Fri I get up in the morning and spend most
of my day @ work. My random thoughts are usually
something like “I want pizza.” “My feet hurt” “Is it break
time, yet?” “I wish I could have a threesome with
Halle Berry & Angelina Jolie.” “What was the name of
that song I heard this morning?” “Is it break time, yet?”
Etc.  Not exactly Divine Revelations that I must share
with the world immediately.

I saw a notice on this comic-book news website that
I read, telling folks to sign up to their Twitter page. It
said something like “Sign up to get breaking news as
it happens!” And I’m thinking, why does anyone need
news about comic-books, RIGHT NOW? What’s the
rush? I can wait until I get home to check out the
new 5-page preview of the June issue of Wonder
Woman, I don’t need an alert @ 3:27pm telling me
that it’s just been posted.

Again, I won’t say it’s bad, or even that I’ll never sign
up, because of my previous opinions on social networking.
Who knows? By this time next year, I could be a
non-stop twittering maniac. But right now I honestly
can’t conceive of having any interest in it.

3 MOVIES THAT I’M TOO SCARED TO EVER WATCH

I love horror movies, but they don’t actually scare me. Okay, the original Amityville Horror & Jaws scared me when I first saw them, but I was little kid, so that doesn’t count.

But, generally speaking, the supernatural doesn’t scare me. What frightens me is REALITY. I have a somewhat morbid imagination, & a naturally pessimistic view of life. I’m Mr. Worst-Case-Scenario. So it’s the stuff that could possibly happen to me that I’m worried about. I can watch films about canniblistic zombies, vampires, werewolves, masked axe-murders, & dream demons all day. But give me a horrible situation, and I’m done.

There are some movies that I refuse to ever watch, just because I don’t even want to imagine being in that situation. To give you (yes, YOU) an idea of what I’m talking about, here’s 3 of them:

From Wikipedia: The film follows a group of women who embark on a caving expedition and become trapped underground. When a group of creatures begin attacking the women, they struggle to survive and escape the cave.

With that description, you can stop @ “trapped underground.” You don’t even need to mention anything about a group of “creatures.” I’m already freaked out.
I’ve written before about how I’m slightly claustrophobic. A couple of weeks ago I went to a local mall, and it turned out it’s undergoing construction, so most of the parking lots were blocked off, & I ended up having to take an elevator to get in and out. It was just 2 floors, but I have to say that in those 40 seconds that it took for the elevator to go up & down, my mind must of imagined a dozen different ways in which I could end up trapped in that elevator (Earthquake? Massive power blackout? Fire?), & die of suffocation. I mean, I didn’t panic or anything, but I felt really uncomfortable.

So I just cannot watch a movie that involves people being trapped underground.

From Wikipedia: An epidemic causes most of the people in an unnamed city to go blind, resulting in the collapse of society. The film follows several people as they try to survive in a makeshift self-governed prison set up by the government as a quarantine area.

I am absolutely terrified of going blind. I don’t know how I would survive. I don’t even like being around blind people. I’m sorry, it just creeps me out. I sometimes wear glasses, that I don’t really need, when reading or @ the computer, just to be on the safe side, and protect my eyesight. So, even though I love Julianne Moore, I passed on this film.

From Wikipedia: Joe Bonham (Bottoms), a young American soldier hit by a artillery shell on the last day of World War I, lies in a hospital bed. He is a quadruple amputee who has also lost his eyes, ears, mouth and nose. He remains conscious and able to reason, however, rendering him a prisoner in his own body.

Need I say more? Really? Can you imagine any existence worse than that?

I first heard of this film years ago, when I heard the song, “ONE,” by the rock band Metallica. Loved the song, but didn’t really know what it was about, until a friend told me of this movie, which is based on a book. Then the lyrics made sense. It’s written from the viewpoint of the lead character.

I cant remember anything
Cant tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside I feel to scream
This terrible silence stops me

Now that the war is through with me
I’m waking up I cannot see
That there is not much left of me
Nothing is real but pain now

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please god,wake me

Back in the womb its much too real
In pumps life that I must feel
But cant look forward to reveal
Look to the time when Ill live

Fed through the tube that sticks in me
Just like a wartime novelty
Tied to machines that make me be
Cut this life off from me

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please god,wake me
Now the world is gone I’m just one
Oh god, help me, hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God help me

Darkness imprisoning me
All that I see
Absolute horror
I cannot live
I cannot die
Trapped in myself
Body my holding cell

Landmine has taken my sight
Taken my speech
Taken my hearing
Taken my arms
Taken my legs
Taken my soul
Left me with life in hell

There are two videos for this song. One just has the band performing the song in an empty auditorium, the other has the performance, but it’s intercut with scenes from the movie. I feel sick even watching the 2nd version of that music video, so there’s no way I could ever watch the actual movie.

And those are just some examples of what I consider to be SCARY MOVIES.